Showing posts with label sisters. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sisters. Show all posts

Monday, August 1, 2011

ten at ten..


it's august!?

ten things about this {almost over} summer of eleven::

one) twin has been home for a while & it feels like she never even left!
two) my friend became a mrs. & I had fun being a part of her special day!
three) bike rides + a cute basket
four) hot hot heat + tan skin
five) loving on my babies + creating everything under the sun with construction paper
six)
learning lots about relationships with people + my relationship with God.
seven) I crossed something off of my list of 30 things to do before I'm 30: #20
eight) fireworks on a rooftop + in a park.
nine) a lot of romans twelve.
ten) a week in nashville: old friends, new friends, seeing God through three sweet little boys, hot & sweaty & getting hands dirty, a homeless man asked me to marry him, sweet little cousins, long bus rides.





Monday, June 20, 2011

MY TWIN IS ALMOST HOME!!!

Today is June 20th & I will see my long-lost-twin-sister for the first time since January 8th! It is weird because it seems like a really long time ago, but also kind of just seems like yesterday!

This has been the longest we've been apart our whole life & after being glued to each others hips for 21 years we finally were doing life on our own, separately from each other. having separate adventures, meeting people as Lindsay or Courtney not as "twins", & we survived & it was good!! God yet again awe's me by His perfect timing with her & I experiencing life on our own for this past season of our lives, becoming individuals, not just twins, not always having someone to come with us, wait with us, a security blanket always at hand!

I'm stoked to see her. Excited to tell her random things that aren't really that funny, but she listens to anyway, hear her long stories, hear the great things God has done in her heart & life in the last few months, stay up late with her, talk in code, get to know her again, just spend time with her!!


I'm praying, praying, & praying some more that adjusting to being "twins" again goes smoothly & we pick up right where we left off!

This is a rich life I live.. thank God for a weekend full of people that make me smile, cool-summer nights, family, & a lot of veggin'!

Here's to a good start of a long next two months of watching babies everyday, being a twin again, & trying to have a little bit of free time!!

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

ten at ten..

ten at ten..

one) Michigan skipped spring, 40's to 90's... I'm digging the hot & sweaty lifestyle the last few weeks!

two) my skin is starting to look sun-kissed & it's not even officially summer yet! Typically it takes at least until the end of July for me to look somewhat tan!!

three) I don't think people understand the craziness of how soon my long lost twin comes home! We're talking two weeks from yesterday!!!!!!!!

*four) The last few days I've been in a funk making me really frustrated, annoyed, & in a bratty mood.. but thankfully it was just a funk, and I'm realizing I'm just really kind of selfish & God is just using circumstances to show me He's in control... not me!
{AND it's just always a punch/slap in the face for me to snap out of because I am SOOOOO spoiled with the life God has given me.. I might not have a million dollars laying around but I'm spoiled & take SO much in this life I've been given for granted wayyyy too easily & I let the feelings of wanting more or not being satisfied get in the way of my thanks/surrendering it all back the One who gave it to me...holla at my mumma for good heart/reality checks.}

five) I've been trying to avoid pants of any sort the last few weeks. Skirts & dresses please! {soon my twin will return home with several dresses waiting for me to borrow..!!}

six) Due to the lack of reliable radio in my car it is obnoxious having to find something to listen to while driving that is not fussy or country music.. so thanks to our friends in the North, CBC Radio 2 has become my new favorite thing in the morning while I drive to work & in the afternoon when I drive home.. I'm obsessed.

seven) I've been dating a pretty sweet guy that I had a crush on for a long time..for seven months now?! It's crazy & makes me happy!

eight) I'm going to Wayne State in the fall {FINALLY!!!!} & one of my sisters roommates is moving out in August.. hmm...

*nine) I've been reading a lot of my old journals lately.. it's SO crazy how different only a year can look from one to the next!?!? Good, bad, ugly, & everything in-between!!!

ten) Hoppipolla by Sigur Ros just came on my iTunes.. I think I will still enjoy this song until I'm 99 years old.

*kind of related: old journals & writing about the good, the bad, & the ugly, being spoiled with this rich life, all kind of correlate.

xox

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

overwhelm {me}...

I should be finishing my homework right now... but Isaiah 61 & I Want to know You by Jesus Culture are distracting me, making me want to jump up & down::

soak up some truth & goodness...

The Spirit of the Sovereign LORD is on me,
because the LORD has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,
to proclaim the year of the LORD’s favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the LORD
for the display of his splendor
.
{isaiah sixty-one}

{Grace never ending
Your hands they carry me

Your body is broken
for all the world to see

my heart is held
by love so unconditional

You captivate me
let Your spirit overwhelm me

let Your presence overtake my heart...}

{picture, totally unrelated:: just r-e-a-l-l-y missing my twin right now..
it has officially been the longest we've gone without communication.}

Saturday, January 8, 2011

au revoir twin..

I don't know if people understand the closeness I share with my twin sister.. we're kind of like a married couple. When I talk to other people I use "we" or "us" a lot. I'm not used to talking to someone & saying "I" or "me". But low & behold, the day has come! We are entering a new season of OUR lives: separation.The longest we've been apart is probably a week? And that was with texting, calling, & facebook! So.. the million dollar question I've been hearing a lot lately is how I'm going to cope without the twin for SIX months.
It really hasn't hit me & probably won't either until tomorrow when we leave the airport or probably Sunday night going to Lighthouse by myself, or sometime next week when I finally realize "oh I have my own car now, I don't have to go pick the twin up from work" or "sweet, I have no one to complain about my mom to!!" :) Either way.. I think {key word: think} I'm ready for it, but we'll see!!
It's kind of exciting too though because we're going to be living six months without each other, being our own person, no longer identifying to new people we meet as "twins" but Courtney or Lindsay. For the first time in both our lives we're going to be experiencing new things without each other as a side kick, support, or security blanket.
All I know is God has paved the way for Courtney's journey from dreaming to it actually being time to start this new adventure! She has done a lot of hard work to get to this point & I know she's been faithful to God calling her to this ministry in the land down under!
So instead of worrying about me & how I'm going to be without her here at home, pray for her safety, for her team she'll be living & working with for the next six months, for funds that still need to be raised, & for Courtney to just be another tool for increasing the Kingdom!

{read about her adventures here..}

Thursday, November 4, 2010

for all my sisters...

This... has taken a long time for me to write! It's hard to talk about some of these topics, but I tried to do it as carefully as I could because it all means a lot to me. It took a lot of tweaking & a lot of asking God for the right words to use. But low & behold here is a lot of words regarding a whole plethora of things I'm passionate about. It's long, so get ready.

I'm writing this specifically geared toward a potpourri of lovely high school girls in my life that are a part of Woodside Student Ministry, but it can relate to any female really no matter her age, including myself. So read this as if I was sitting across from you at Starbucks over a cup of coffee or hot chocolate....

If you & I were sitting down at a Starbucks, Caribou, Panera, your house, my house, at church, wherever, to chat about life, love, & other mysteries right now, I would as gently & as lovingly as I could scream this into your heart, because I love YOU. Do me a favor & read this slowly. Soak it up. Drink up some truth for a minute {or two} sister. {I'm screaming it all right into my own heart too..}

{YOU are beautiful no matter what.}
You my sweet friend, are a beauty. Your freckles, your eyes, your eye lashes, your mouth, your smile, your teeth; straight, crooked, with braces, with spaces, white or yellow.. are beautiful. Your eye brows; skinny, bushy, plucked, waxed, untouched... are beautiful. Your ears, your nose, your blemishes, your acne, everything on your face that your make-up hides.. is beautiful. Your height, your weight, your skin color, your toes, your fingers, your arms, your tummy, everything about YOU.. is beautiful. And are exactly how & where a very crafty Creator perfectly intended. Before time began God was sketching a picture of YOU & deciding where each freckle, birth mark, & mole would be on your body. Do not FOR ONE SECOND let ANYONE {your mom, sister, brother, dad, uncle, aunt, grandma, grandpa, friend, BEST friend, or the reflection in your mirror} tell you otherwise.

{YOU are worth more than YOU could ever imagine.}
Sister, do you know how much you're REALLY worth? Do you know that a King gave His WHOLE life for just YOU? Do you know that He saved YOU? Do you know YOU mean more than anything in the world to HIM? Did you know He chose YOU to be His? He wants YOU. Do you know YOU are desired by an all-knowing, all-loving, mysterious, wondrous God? Did you know YOU are written on HIS heart? Did you know YOU are worth more than any precious jewels, diamonds, or rubies to Him? Did you know He craves time with just YOU? Did you know He longs for YOU? Did you know HE wants what's best for YOU? Did you know He knows what YOUR heart needs? Did you know He is the author of YOUR story? This Man, is your Beloved & He is YOURS, YOU are His. If you let Him be. Even if you don't right now.. He'll be waiting patiently for YOU to come running into His arms. Even if you can't accept His love for YOU, you are STILL worth more than anyone or anything to HIM & that He'll always be there just for YOU. Sister, no man, husband, boyfriend, friend, anyone or anything.. can ever love you as much as He does.

{are YOU talking to God?}
Do you talk to our God? Like really, REALLY talk to Him? Do you talk to Him about the desires of your heart? Do you ask Him to do God-sized things in your life? Do you believe He can do God-sized things in your life? Do you get on your face before Him pleading for direction, guidance, or wisdom for your journey? Don't be scared, ashamed, embarrassed, or feeling unworthy when it comes to talking to God about the the biggest, craziest, or teeny-tiniest desires of your heart! He already knows ALL of them, and the desires of your heart ten years from now, and fifty years from now. He desires to hear all about it from YOU. Let Him know when you have a good, great, horrible, exciting, horrific, sad, or happy day. Let Him know when you're frustrated with Him, let go of your pride & let Him know you really don't have it all together & you NEED Him to hold your hand & guide YOU.

*{the future husband prayer.}
Story time, I remember sitting in my seventh grade English class (at a Christian school) with Mrs. Smith & her telling us about her & her husband. She told us that she had started praying for her husband when she was young, I guess it never really crossed my mind until she mentioned that, but I liked it & it caught my attention. Since then I've pretty much done the same. The prayer has changed a bit over the years but has stayed pretty constant: "God, I don't know who HE is, where HE is, or what HE's doing right now..." you get the gist of it right? I believe in a big God. I believe in a God who listens to His children when they call on Him. You talk, He listens, even if you're talking about someone you can only dream about right now. You can even use my prayer for Prince Charming if you want!

{hold high standards for YOURSELF}
As a twenty-one year old, college student, there are a whole lot of OTHER things I could be doing with my life right now that people my age, younger, or older are involved with. I could be a smoker, I could be an alcoholic, I could be sleeping with a different guy every weekend, I could be out all night making bad decisions & doing a lot of things I would regret later on. As a pretty sensitive person with an overly guilty conscience, I'm not anywhere near involved with any of that. I hold pretty high standards for myself & want to be a good example to YOU, to be someone YOU can look up to. I'M NOT PERFECT (by any stretch of the imagination), but I want to be there for YOU. I want to be here to encourage YOU. I want to be a voice in YOUR head to remind you that you DON'T have to do this or that to look "cool" or to "fit in", that it's OK to stand out & be different. As Christians we're supposed look different from the world, don't let the garbage of this world tempt YOU! Decide what you want people's view of you to look like. Do you want to be different? To look like a little Christ? I survived high school without going to homecoming, any house parties, prom, without drinking, doing drugs, or having sex, and I still had a very fun & pleasant high school experience that left me feeling blessed.

{If you're a female, YOU are captivating.}
The word captivate is a verb that simply means to hold the attraction of a noun (in this case, YOU as a woman, girl, lady, she, her, sister, daughter, all around female; are captivating to the male species.) You catch their attention, catch his attention the right way though. Be captivating by being who YOU are. Don't try to be someone or something you're not to catch his attention.. Sister you're captivating the way you are, being yourself. Don't be a chameleon. PLEASE, don't be. Don't change who you are to win the attention of a GUY! If that's the case.. then he is NOT worth your while. He should be interested in who YOU are, not who you pretend to be!

{survive high school/college without a boyfriend!?}
Crazy I know, but SISTER, I'm just going to say it, and you can argue with me about it if you want but dating in high school is a waste of time. *Any guy reading this can hear this too because it's the truth, I have two younger brothers, one in high school, guys in high school are not looking for a serious relationship, a wife, a soul-mate. You are not ready to get married or to be someone's wife. (dating in my book is for marriage, not a recreational sport, you & I can talk about this another time..) The chances of your high school relationship(s) lasting after graduation is slim to none. Have guy friends! Have fun with them! Hang out with them! Get to know them! Sister, graduate from high school, go to college, get a degree, travel, start a revolution, experience your late teen-twenties-days, AND if God brings a potential-God-fearing-handsome-man into your story in the midst of your college-travel-degree-getting-revolution-making-days, then let it be. I've done it, I'm doing it right now. I've survived. I am about as single as one can be, I've never had a boyfriend, I've never been in a relationship, and guess what? I have friends that are my age or younger that are married, engaged, or in serious relationships, & I'm still confused, learning, & trying to understand the whole male-species as a twenty-one year old. That's all I can say about this..

{YOU deserve nothing less than better, than the best.}
When/if a guy wanders into your life, he should respect you for who YOU are & the standards YOU hold for yourself. He should be encouraging & building you up, not discouraging you or tearing you down (physically, verbally, or emotionally). He should be friends with your friends. You deserve a guy who loves the Lord & likes to talk about what God is doing in both of your lives. You deserve a guy who challenges you spiritually & encourages you in your walk with God. He should be knowledgeable of the Bible. He should have a band of brothers who challenge him. He should have another guy in his life that challenges him spiritually & keeps him accountable. You also deserve a man who prays for you & with you. That's just some of what you deserve in a man. Don't settle for anything less or anything convenient.

{THEY need US to help them.}
As girls we like to look nice, we like to feel attractive, we like positive attention right? As daughters of the King, it's our responsibility to help our BROTHERS. What we wear, how we look, the way we move, the way we act, the things we say, can all alter how a guy views us. We're responsible for helping guard their purity & helping them by not being a stumbling block in their lives. There is a way to look nice & feel attractive without putting a negative light on ourselves as women. It builds character & helps us feel good about ourselves when we know we're not causing one of our brothers to stumble. And on the contrary.. I have no tolerance for MEN of any age talking disrespectfully about any girl, whether I know her or not. So let's save all of ourselves some trouble & protect our brothers eyes & help them to not have to talk in a demeaning way to us because of our appearance or how we carry ourselves, carry yourself like the Princess you are.

{Be productive in the waiting for Prince Charming..}
As women we long to be pursued. Our heart desires that special attention from a male, we like that special attention. While we wait for him to come into our stories we can't be wishing our lives away, we can't be sitting back & wallowing in self-pity because Prince Charming hasn't come along yet! We need to be spending time with our God. We need to be hanging out with our SISTERS. We need to be growing & learning things along the way & experiencing the life God has given to us. It's OK to be the wedding-dreaming-baby-name-list-making-sappy-Matt-Wertz-love-song-listening girl.. like myself, as long as you are growing in your relationship with God. Let Him show YOU what He wants for your story. Where He wants you to be. All of our stories are different. All of us experience life in different ways, just let God continue orchestrating it while you wait ever-so patiently for Prince Charming to sweep you off your feet. So when Prince Charming comes to sweep you off your feet, sweet sister of mine, your heart is so in tune with your FIRST LOVE's heart that He allows a new man in your life.. it will be a beautiful thing.


You made it. You read these words, do some soaking up, write some things down, process it however you chose fit, but I'd really like to hear from YOU sister. I don't give out my phone number very freely, but I have e-mail, facebook, & do enjoy sitting at coffee shops for chats.

{lefillmore@comcast.net --this goes to my phone or lindsayefillmore@gmail.com}

Thursday, September 9, 2010

playing grown up...

Recently I remembered the slogan for Toys R Us that says: "I don't want to grow up, I want to be a Toys R Us kid!"

This week more than ever, time & time again I've had that feeling. I don't want to grow up. A few weeks ago I turned 21 & when I was younger 20+ sounded SO old! I don't feel that old, even though I have some "grown up" responsibilities that I have to deal with in this season of my life, I'm still young.

Sometimes I try to pretend to be a girl version of Peter Pan & that my bank account will just put money in on its own, my diabetic related stuff would deal with themselves, my car would fix itself, or my college credits would turn into a degree with recess & snack time... then I open my eyes & that's not the case! Being somewhat "grown up" means I need a job to support myself, I need to take care of my medical stuff, I need to go to school to get a degree, to get a better job...etc.
So now I'm just finishing one of my favorite Disney movies: Beauty & the Beast. And it's reminding me of rainy afternoons with my sisters in the family room of our childhood home, with thick, dark, blue carpet, watching Beauty & the Beast, & eating granola bars. Those were the days. I have very fond childhood memories & remember wanting to "be a grown up", so here I am starting my adult life & longing for my childhood: the easy, play dates, stress free, pretend, playhouse days.
BUT on the contrary there are days I feel like a "real adult" {whatever that really entails} when I have to take care of important things, pay my insurance bills, fill out paper work, get up early on my day off to cross things off my list, be responsible, whatever it is, is when I feel like I'm "playing grown-up", {check out Brooke's blog about playing grown up!!} because I'm not 100% independent. I live back at my parents house, I'm not married like my mom was when she was 21, I don't own a home, pay taxes, have to grocery shop (anymore..), I have it pretty easy {in the grand scheme of things, even though sometimes it doesn't feel like that!}, therefore I feel like I'm just pretending.
Someday, perhaps I'll feel like a true "grown up", until then I'll just finish watching Beauty & the Beast & sleep in tomorrow morning..

Saturday, September 4, 2010

craving some fall...

Fall, is my favorite season, I love spring, summer, & winter (sometimes) but fall, is my all time fave. I think the mid-west does fall best & I think growing up with Michigan falls {cider mills, apple orchards, pumpkin patches, pretty leaves..} is why I like it. Although fall technically isn't until September 22nd, I feel like it starts once Labor Day comes around & school starts. I already started school & it's Labor Day weekend, so bring on fall!

{I love my summer, warm weather, (some) time off, being tan, going to the beach, sun dresses, but I'm ready for the cooler weather.}

Today was the almost perfect Saturday. I slept in a little, I bummed around Arts, Beats, & Eats with my sisters for a while, had my first pumpkin spice latte from the bucks, I wore my favorite sweater & wasn't too hot, I played my guitar for a little while to some Band of Horses songs {good fall music if you're looking for something to get into fall mode.} (which are pretty easy to strum & sing to, which makes me happy!), went on a bike ride date with my youngest brother to get ice cream, bought a new dress & tunic from Lost & Found which can be worn during fall with boots, & gathered some of my favorite things about fall...


1.) apple orchards
{my family for every year since I can remember has gone to Erwin's Apple Orchard to pick apples & pumpkins.. always a good time, always a good memory.}
2.) crunchy leaves
{sometimes I go out of my way to step on crunchy leaves.. and although I have bad memories of having to help my dad rack our mammoth backyard growing up, I still love crunchy leaves on the ground.}
3.) pumpkin spice latte's
{only enjoyable on a fall-esque day, nice & hot.}

4.) scarves
{thick knit scarves, or light weight lose fitting scarves, always my favorite.}

5.) earth tones
{I think I like earth tones all year round, but they are more fun during the fall to wear & fit in with the colors outside, I've been to a few fall weddings & think earth tones are ideal for weddings.}

6.) school supplies
{perhaps this is why I want to be a teacher...}

7.) boots
{not thick winter boots or rain boots, cute ankle-knee high boots, with a pair of skinny jeans or a dress.}

8.) cider mills
{doughnuts & hot cider.}

9.) franklin, tn
{fall time in the south is a little warmer & seems to go into at least December, but not just Franklin but the surrounding areas are pretty great to drive through when the leaves are changing colors.}

10.) bon fires
{a way to actually keep warm unlike bon fires during the summer..}


*happy {early} fall

Thursday, February 12, 2009

*real childlike magic...



mad props to my sister for this picture...i just had to steal it though. not to sound cliche, but i really do think a picture is worth more than a thousand words. i could go on for hours probably talking about this picture. it just shows so much innocence, simplicity, love, joy....

although there is a lot going on in this picture, obviously the three girls on the tire swing definitely stand out the most. i love that they are wearing their summer clothes, it looks like the blonde darling is wearing her bathing suite, they are having an amazing time at a week of camp, their hair is blowing from swinging, they are meeting new friends, they are laughing, learning, growing, they are holding on super tight, they are probably giggling, & they are totally embracing their turn on that tire swing. . . . i l o v e t h a t.


so how does a picture of the nashville skyline & the batman building have anything to do with a darling picture of some girls on a tire swing...

well, those girls in that swing, may or may not remember that experience at their week of camp in the summer of two thousand and eight, but i definitely have fond, delightful, enjoyable, wonderful, nostalgic memories of being in the nashville area with my family during a large chunk of my childhood.

i think that i have fallen in love with such a city because of all my favorite memories from growing up are related to being in the nashville area at my grandpas old house, his crazy huge backyard with a hill up one side, downtown franklin, uncles & aunts, 8-10 hour rides in the car to get there, downtown nashville, the batman building, country music, opry, driving with my uncle during his senior year of high school to pizza hut listening to brown eyed girl, rec-world for go-carting, driving around the hills to see crazy huge houses, even my grandpas new house with my younger cousins, always having deli-style sandwiches for lunch, riding scooters up & down my grandpas street...

sigh... along with all that, for a really long time i wanted to work in the music industry in nashville, because i really do love music and always thought that sort of job would be a lot of fun to have... but this last semester i definitely changed my mind and am 99.9% sure i want to be an elementary school teacher. i still want to live in nashville though.

i honestly pray often that God would send me down there eventually, and i do believe that God puts desires in our hearts & wants to bring us those desires. He knows i want to and long to live there so badly, i just have to wait on His timing, to see if that is where He takes me!

hopefully one day i can call the 615, nashvegas, or music city usa h o m e.

ps. it is raining at the moment..i l o v e the sound of rain outside. i also l o v e sitting in my grandpas covered back porch in nashville when it is raining...

Saturday, December 27, 2008

*its t h r e e .... i should be sleeping


*honestly, i neeeed to curve this habit of mine. i stay up much to late. late enough that commercials for excersie equipment, acne cleanser, & natural make up comes on. i am currently sitting in my bed,wide-eyed, i dont even know why? i cant recall the last time i went to bed before 1 to 2 am.... its not very healthy. anyway, while i am up.....here are some random thoughts of mine about life, love, & other mysteries...



L I F E .

christmas has come & gone.
[much to quickly]

christmas consisted of:
-friends
-[extended] family
-all seven fillmores under one roof for a few days
-cookies
-gifts
-cleaning
-eating
-movies

there is a lot of snow this year
but its going to be almost fifty tomorrow [today]...!?

walking up to the corner for coffee & lunch...has become one of my new favorite activities

i am d e t e r m i n e d to get healthy [for real] in oh-nine.
*not just physically, but also spiritually...
-having diabetes i should automatically want to be and force myself to be healthy, but i have a case of procrastination and laziness more often times than not.
-i need to [get more sleep]
-run more often
-eat healthier
-i need to have more dates with my Jesus
-get to know Him more.
*i can do ALL things thru Christ who strengthens me.

sisterly L O V E .

i am very thankful for t w o sisters.
-although we are not exactly "best friends" [all three of us], i do enjoy the time i spend with both of them at the same time. especially when we attempt to ditch extended-family gatherings, and brittany tries to teach c & i how to knit...
- i admire how bold and brave my older sister is. she seems to not be afraid of anything & is always looking for something new and exciting to take on. she is so creative and loves to help people.
-and then theres courtney. we might have pretty similar dna, but we are pretty different. i wish i was as artistic as courtney. although i try to play piano or guitar, draw or write, courtney seems to have this eye for artistic things. i love that. her & i also just really have this bond, that i really dont think i could ever share with anyone else...perhaps a future husband, but we'll have to wait & see..
-i do take both of them for granted a lot... and treat them poorly a lot, but i have been working on showing them more genuine love lately....


*the following could & should be its own topic, but its on my mind [at three-ish a.m.]....!?


O T H E R M Y S T E R I E S .

to be completely honest...
-i am that girl, who has dreamed of getting married and having a wedding, since--well since i can remember. i dont typically talk about this dream of mine unless im with brittany joy or courtney, but i really cannot wait.

-but wedding plans aside, since seventh grade when my english teacher [at a christian school of course] talked to us about praying for our future spouses, i pretty much have done since then.
-typically when i am talking to God i pray something like this: "dear God, i dont know who he is, where he is, or what he is doing right now...." and then go on, but then i bite my tongue and pray about my future with or without a husband. and ask God to help me to be content with His plans for me--married or not.

-saying that God does bless me with a man that loves God more than he love me, that i'd call my husband...then i can't wait to plan a wedding, wear a fancy dress, & be a princess for a day, and then actually be married to my best friend & spend the rest of our lives together for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from that day forward until death do us part.

-i talk to my mom a lot about this subject. [joking-ly] courtney & i ask my mom if she is concerned that none of her twenty-one & nineteen year old daughters have ever had a boyfriend or even been asked out on a date before. then my lisa [i call my mom by her first name. i have for a while now, i dont really now since when. but she knows i respect her & its kind of a running joke between her & i...'lisa' says it's a "term of endearment":)] replys: "no, i am not concerned, i think that i am blessed..." not her words exactly but, she so often reminds the three daughters that "he" is out there somewhere & God will bring "him" into our lives in His own timing. mmm. *truth.

-so often after conversations like these occur, i think about these things & realize how i am blessed that somehow [by the grace of God no doubt] that i have been raised to not long or desire to have to always have a boyfriend, or be aggressive & seek such attention from guys. i think that i am blessed because i haven't had to face heartbreak, disappointment, or temptation throughout my teen years thus far. i do wish, hope, & pray that if God brings that guy into my life, that he's the one, and that he's the only one.

-in a nutshell, i admire those who don't have to date +1 gentlemen, but "date" & marry one.
-i really do feel blessed that i have never dated or been in a "serious" relationship. being friends with guys is good for me.
-i really do enjoy praying & wondering about a future husband that really does love his Jesus more than me.
-also, i do love wisdom from my lisa.


*i hope everyone had a delightful christmas & didn't just think about opening gifts or eating cookies, but remembered that the only reason we even have christmas is because a Savior was born to die for us & save us from a life of sin & apart from Him.

ABBA FATHER,
thank You for sending Your Son to this earth
to be born, life, & die as a man for me.
thank You for family.
thank You for siblings.
help me to show them real love more often.
thank You for a mom who loves You
& relays wisdom about You & Your plan for me, to me.
thank You for taking me back always.
even when so often times i get away from You.
thank You for random things on my mind, at four in the morning....


deep breath.
now i am ready to close my eyes.


PS:
i suggest you get your hands on a copy of "Advent Songs" by Soujourn. it is a beautiful set of christmas songs. i will definitely find myself listening to it, long after christmas time....





Tuesday, December 2, 2008

*so long n o v e m b e r...


i simply love this time of the year.

i don't want to sound cliche, but i do have a lot to be thankful for.

in michigan fall doesn't last long enough.

"autumn fallin' from trees, the snow is up to our knees..."

(random snow-fall, while there are still leaves on the ground waiting to be raked!?)

thanksgiving came & went.

christmas music should NOT start on november first.

it makes me smile when all seven fillmore's are in the same house.

my sister had a birthday.

i do love downtown detroit.

detroit urban art makes me smile.

the weather isn't too cold, yet.

christmas lights, trees, & decorations are up.

music is still one of my favorite things.

iTunes 'genius bar' playlists are/is(?) the best invention.

apple is amazing because they replace broken iPods.

hearing my sister describe 'hippsters' makes me laugh.

i adore boots & fun-cute coats.

aaron's toe is semi-healed completely.

"HE MUST BECOME GREATER; i must become less" john three:thirty.

i am blessed with an amazing church/community that i love.

being a co-small-group leader for an amazing group of junior girls at wsm makes my heart happy.

hillsong's 'i heart the revolution: hearts as one' dvd makes me dream of doing what they do/are doing.

i wish i took pictures/edited them more often.

i still love the city of nashville. (and really would move there any day!)

i think that black friday shopping is ridiculous.

this time next year i want to be getting ready to go to south africa.

the push for 'woodside world-wide' makes me want to go to a million different places!

november flew by terribly fast...

so long n o v e m b e r.

hello d e c e m b e r.

twenty-five days until christmas :)



Thursday, June 5, 2008

*i can hear birds outside, i should go to bed now....

i graduated on sunday

i went to sleep at 5am woke up at 4pm

[my sleeping pattern is never going to be the same]

i worked at plum for once finally

i saw death cab at the fox

[i loved them before, but love even more now]

spectacular

rogue wave was also there, they arent bad

the wings won the stanley cup

[while we were downtown by hokeytown!]

im in love with viva la vida & violet hill

downtown royal oak is fun when its warm outside

[while i was over there the other night they were tapping a lifetime movie!?]

being out of school is still the best feeling

i need a bike

gas is tooo expensive

i like watching old home movies with my sisters

my sisters & i are still in love with brendan leonard

if you dont know who that is look him up online

i want to see hillsong united in chicago in august

it boggles my mind that they play good music videos at 3am when no one is watching them except for us

i really do enjoy running

i love summer clothes

jewelry is more expensive at claries than at for love by 21...?

i still want to move to nashville

i need to start playing my guitar more...


Friday, January 11, 2008

*hello 2 0 0 8....

i decided i hate paying for gas.

but i'm thankful for a car to put pricey gasoline in.

the Lord's plan for my future keeps unfolding.
its nerve racking to think about.
but i
pray that i go in the direction He is calling me to go in.

oakland county, as of now, is my mission field.
here am i Lord,
send me.

i love downtown detroit.

one day i want to see the world.
before i die i want to go to
south africa, australia, india, thailand& italy.

starting this year i am going to work on making dreams into reality.

growing up is scary, but exciting all at the same time.

playing hoppipolla by sigur ros on the piano , makes me smile.

next year, business major and minor in psychology?

i really have no idea what i am going to do this summer.

stay home and work, go up to lake ann now perhaps?

i really do value my time with my sisters [and the brothers].

coffee, lit candles, good acoustic music, a good book, and rain are ideal.

why do teachers give quizzes on mondays?

prince charming is out there somewhere. he'll come for me.
God is still writing my love story.

"Blessed is SHE who believes, that what the LORD has said to HER will be accomplished."
--Luke 1:45